Rummaging through my purse, I hunted for a piece of paper but came up short with only a bandaid wrapper. It was better than nothing… I wrote my number down on the bandaid wrapper and passed it the eight-year-old boy to give to his mom. This was my chance to make a new female friend in my 30s.
“Hand this to your mother, okay? It has my number on it and that way we can set up a playdate for you and Hunter.” Honestly, I wasn’t sure if the phone number would make it to the hands of his mother but I had to hope.
Earlier that week, my son made a buddy at camp while we were spending time in the mountains. We ran into his buddy in town one afternoon, and I introduced myself to his mom. After our brief exchange I regretted not asking for her number. I should have been bold. This was my chance to not only create a friendship for Hunter but, also for myself. Fun fact: we don’t know anyone in town. We come every summer, but we don’t have local friends.
Thankfully, a week later, the two boys found each other at a local concert. I knew this was too good to be true and had to figure out how to get her contact info. Thankfully, right after I sent the boy off to find his mom. He came back and said, “my mom said I could give you her number.” I literally gave a fist pump in excitement about making a new friendship happen in my 30s.
The next thing I know, we had planned a dinner date playdate for adults and kids. Not only that but, we ended up having a lot of shared values. One being reciprocity in friendship. The next week we sent texts back and forth with future playdate details and she even made time to read my book.
The whole week I thought: God you see me. You really see me. You were three steps ahead on this one.
Sure, I hadn’t expected to make any friendships during our visits and yet, the Lord blessed our family with a new family friend who we enjoyed but also reciprocated our same friend energy–which is basically all in.
During our dinner, I thanked her for saying “yes” when I asked to do the playdate. I mean we were the ones passing through. We were complete strangers to them. Her and her husband responded, “yeah, we thought about that but then we also thought, why not.” I appreciate the openness to a new connection and I think we both left glad we had set apart time to get together.
We left saying we would keep in touch and make sure we align next summer’s camp schedules so our kids could be together again. A true friendship win.
My story is to remind you:
Female friends are still happening organically in your 30s
When you get that feeling of some spark of connection–say something. Reach out. Ask for a number. Follow up.
Female friendship takes two mature people in your 30s
It takes two people to say yes and be open-minded to a new friendship. You can’t always be responsible for someone else’s response but you can commit to being open to new friendships yourself. We are no longer in high school, you don’t need to play games with a new friendship. Either follow up in a timely manner to let them know your schedule isn’t available to a new consistent friendship right now.
So, what’s your latest connection moment? Is there a woman in your community you’ve seen a few times but haven’t introduced yourself yet? Ask God for courage to approach her. It always feels nice to receive an invitation to a new friendship.
Want to listen to more stories on adult friendships: You can catch me on the WonderfullyMade podcast. 
